


If love was a color

by Mest489



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Character Study, Colors, Falling In Love, Fluff, Love, Love Confessions, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-07
Updated: 2018-06-07
Packaged: 2019-05-19 05:43:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14867730
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mest489/pseuds/Mest489
Summary: Have you ever thought of feelings as colors?





	If love was a color

**Author's Note:**

> So I wanted to write something, and this popped into my head, maybe it's been done before, but I've always liked the idea of Danny's eyes meaning so much to Steve, the fact that they are a beautiful shade of blue was what inspired me, hope you like it  
> XO  
> Mest489

Have you ever thought of feelings as colors? Steve has, maybe not in a particularly poetical way like how the writer's write about life and the meaning of it, but more practically and simply. He started imagining feelings were colors when his mother died, black was the color he perceived when his eyelids were closed and he cried himself to sleep, he thought of colors as a way to remind himself that he could feel more than pain.

He assigned yellow to happiness, that was the color of his mother's favorite summer dress, happy memories of his childhood flooded his mind when he thought of yellow, it helped him when he was on a mission in some faraway country, bruised and tired, once when he felt dead was about to take him he thought yellow was the prettiest color ever and hoped it'll be the color of heaven, he woke up three days later in a hospital bed surrounded by white.

White was sterile, it was cleanliness and in some way it was comfort, every time he woke up and saw white it meant he was alive, be it the bright lights of a hospital or the ones that hanged from the ceiling in the base he was in at the time, it became a default, a color he could rely on, it was one of the colors of his uniforms after all.

Navy was the name and the color that he decided to call home, it was a cold institution don't get it wrong it left him with many scars both physical and emotional, but it was home when he didn't have one, when he was torn apart from the remnants of his broken family by the man he thought loved him the most, he couldn't think of the previous color of the word family, nor he wanted to remember, it was too hard for him, and besides it had been a long time since that, it was before Steve felt in colors.

Red though, he remembers red, it was the color he saw when his father abandoned him and his sister, it was the color he felt when in a mission towards his enemies, it was what drove him for far too long, his rage, the blood of the people he killed for his country, he found porpoise in red, felt it coursing through his veins, it was his refuge when he was lacking will, that's what made him a grate soldier, it was also the color he saw when his father was taken from him.

Hazel was a tricky color, at first it meant camaraderie, belonging to a cause, that's what he though it meant the first time he met her, then it became friendship the kind that was full of trust and understanding, she was the first to show him compassion and kindness, it also meant powerful she didn't need him but she chose him, then it became romance and stood there frozen for a while through his father dying, and the beginnings of Five-0, then it transformed, and for some time he thought it was love, that maybe he had been able to find his American dream of a wife and probably children and perhaps even a dog in a yellow house with a white fence, but before he could secure his dream she left and hazel turned to sorrow and eventually just a memory.

Gold was the color he chose for Five-0, the color of their badge, the color of winning over the bad guys, at first it was just that, a tool to catch the bastard that killed his father, with time gold turned its meaning to friendship, it meant people that knew his fucked up past and still chose to stay with him, for him, it was like coming home and maybe that was what really meant, certainly not since the beginning, but pretty close, because gold turned from just Five-0 to Ohana, a word he never though he would use again, felling dreadful at the thought that maybe it would all be a farce just like his mother's death was, but then they were a family before he found out the truth about his mother, and learning that only made their bond stronger, even now that Chin and Kono left Hawaii and Tani, and Junior were added to their family their friendship was still as solid as ever, and Steve could not be more grateful, because gold gave him different shades of brown, and a beautiful shade of blue.

Blue, blue was the color of the water he swam in, of the sky over his head, but above all, blue is the color of Danny's eyes, a really particular shade, it is brighter than the water reflecting the sun but darker than the sky, so he decided to name it Danno's blue, at first, for a brief period it meant frustration at not being able to control, at that moment he thought of the ocean, harsh and uncommanding, even for the most experienced sailors and Steve would know that, maybe that was what frustrated him the most, but after the man helped clear his name and rescued him from so many horrible places Danny's eyes seemed like the sky were birds were free to fly.

Blue surrounded him, and he thought he was crazy, he knew he loved the man, had known for a while even before he said it for the first time when that building collapsed on them and Danny's beautiful blue eyes looked so vulnerable Steve wanted to protect him, hold him and never let go, just like he felt when the sarin attack, and the bomb, and Colombia, and when Danny gave him his liver and most recently when he was shot, Steve felt like if that were the end, if he never got to see Danno's blue again then all color would leave his life, because he knew then that - as hard and dismissive it sounded of all their memories - hazel was never going to compare to beautiful blue eyes adorned with blond lashes like rays of sun, a color so profound he knew his life would never be the same if he lost that hue, because if love were ever to be a color it'd be Danno's blue.

Blue, he realized was the color he longed to see every day, even before he opened his windows, imagining sleepy eyes looking at him from the spot next to him in his bed, body’s warm from sleep and a lazy smile forming in those delicious looking lips, so he decided - after a month of thinking - that he was to act on his feelings before it was too late, a dismissive voice in his head shouted snarky '8 years', and yeah it has been 8 years, but before he had been too confused and - he will admit - scared, wasting time with meaningless relationships just as Danny has, but now they were both free, and he was determined to catch his dream and never let him go, he already had the house, avowed beaten and old, but he had a home and a dog and Danny has two precious children that he loves like they were his, so maybe he never lost his chance at his American dream when Catherine left, but his perception was clouded by what he thought he wanted, and now he knows what he needs.

When he told Danny that he was and still is positively and irrevocably madly in love with him, it wasn't in a particularly grandiose manner, but in his house seated in his adirondack chairs, beers in hand looking at the sunset, after he finished the longest and most awkwardly paused speech of his life he looked back at Danny, and if he thought he was beautiful before then now he was devastatingly breath taking, blue eyes shining with unshed silver tears, a pink blush adorning his face an expression of absolute love that Steve knew he will remember for the rest of his life, and when Danny kissed him he tasted like warmth, home, family, and love.


End file.
